Letting Go

The day after.

Usually it consists of pain, blurred vision, headaches and lots of fry-ups. But that's for hangover sufferers. I've never had one so I probably don't know of the dulled experience of it. But watching friends go through this phase of life, it pretty much convinces me that I don't want to go through it as well.

I was referring more towards the day after pitching the ideas for the 35mm commerical in school. In the middle of my preparation - about 2 hours before the actual pitch - feverishly scribbling and sketching away with my newly bought felt tip colour markers, I came to a conclusion. In a sense, it was so hyped up so much by others that I wanted it really badly. But I realized that the more I wanted it, the more I obsessed over it. The more I obsessed over it, the more I realized that it was unhealthy.

I was reading from somewhere that it's not the fear of failure but rather failing in front of everyone after doing one's best that scared the crap out of me the most. I want to do my best. But in doing so, I'd expose myself to all sorts of criticisms and whatnot. I guess one just has to grow a thick skin and learn to deal with it. Do your best and then leave it. Otherwise I'd only have regrets of 'If only' and 'what if I'd done that instead...' blablabla. I guess some of you would be able to identify with that.

Once that was in place, I felt much more peaceful. It doesn't matter if I don't get it. Whatever position I get assigned to, I'll just do my best on it and learn as much as I can about it, as on a real flm set. It's the learning and application of it that counts.

Next up, FOOD! Talking to Singaporeans here has led me to one simple conclusion. We're obsessed about food. We talk about food. We use food in our peripheral speech and as the main context. Heck, all our subtext is filled with nothing but food talk. Typical, you might think. Maybe if you're still in Singapore, but after living in Europe for the last 10 years, it's amazing how we still think in the like manner. Guess it's part of the Singapore gene now. I wouldn't be surprised if a singapore ghost came up one day and asked where to get the best roti prata this side of town. Not that I'd want to meet one. The army had enough experiences there for me.

I should work a little more on my blog to be honest. But then again, *should* is such a subjective word, don't you think?

It's that time of year again...

I'm supposed to be doing storyboarding for my final film today. Final film? Yeah, time does fly quick when you're stuck in intensive stuff. I wish it would have lasted longer though because the experience has been great so far. Although going back home to wifey does have its *positive* sides. It's just that after being with the same guys for the last 5 months has been a great experience. One that I'm happy to have been part of.

We do pitches for our 35mm commercial shoots tomorrow. I hope I get mine accepted. Well, on a wing and a prayer since I had to look upwards for some inspiration for them. Weatherwise, London has been just abysmal. Rain and winter-like temperatures this last bank holiday weekend when I - and probably everyone else - would have preferred sunshine.

Still, I can't complain too much because I managed to go out with 2 sets of singaporeans who are based in London. First up was at a german bierhaus by the river at Richmond. I told wifey I might go back down there with her if only to get more Radler and sauerkraut. The irony of flying from Germany to get "authentic" german food in London hasn't been lost on her. Next was San calling me up after church on Sunday asking me to meet up with him and a couple of friends on-the-fly. That was a good time as well, and I got to get myself some leftover food. Mmmm yummy. :)

Oh, and I signed up for the overseas singapore group in London called EST1819 - you can find it here - http://singaporeans.meetup.com/51/?a=wm1_mem3. Macs just don't have hyperlink capabilities like PCs. Oh well. One can't have everything I guess.

Well, back to class now. I wish I had an internet access but that's life for the moment.

Second Term Begins...

I'm feeling kinda miffed because the digital section of my camera is broken. Strangely, it didn't happen in the last 2 years when I really abused my camera by chucking it under heavy objects in my bag, but it had to happen now, under some tubgs of yogurt and lettuce. Goes to show the evil inherent in milk-based products.

So I went to get it checked out at the local electronic store, and guess what, they offered to charge me 50 Euros just to give me an estimation on how much it would actually cost to get the camera repaired. 50 EUROS!!! FOR NOTHING!!! And you wonder how the heck the economy runs in Germany. So I promptly said, thanks but nuh-uh. I'll happily buy a new camera across the corridor from *your* competitor. Adios! Gotta love the power of choice.

I do wish I had more internet access though, so I can keep the blog running regularly. I calculated how much an annual contract with BT with cost me in London and it worked out to be - including installation costs - around 55 pounds per month. In other words, NOT worth it. Strange thing is, I've got a phone box downstairs which isn't used, but the landlady doesn't want to use it for internet purposes. Oh well. Some people are just plain wierd. Or backwards, or both.

But back to the camera, I'd have taken some nice shots for the blog this week, but seeing as it's out of commission....

Back to School

1 week passes by real quickly. Too quickly for me, at least. So next week it'll be back to school and no more regular internet access. The strange thing is that after 4 months of no internet access, I'm perfectly fine doing without it. Anyhow, the internet has gotten pretty boring, if only to check emails, and keep up on news around the world.

London is a good place for shopping and maybe a little sightseeing, but I think that's pretty much about it considering the high prices everywhere. Strangely enough, I thought continental Europe was expensive when I was living here but compared to London, it's considered cheap.

Anyhow, I've been really lazy about updating this blog, but frankly, it's not something I'd do daily what with an inconsistent internet connection and the lack of security on public computers. Till the next time I get online, ta for now.

Oh, and I've gotten back to killing flying insects that bug me now that it's slowly turning into summer. Death to all flying bugs!!!