Letting Go
The day after.
Usually it consists of pain, blurred vision, headaches and lots of fry-ups. But that's for hangover sufferers. I've never had one so I probably don't know of the dulled experience of it. But watching friends go through this phase of life, it pretty much convinces me that I don't want to go through it as well.
I was referring more towards the day after pitching the ideas for the 35mm commerical in school. In the middle of my preparation - about 2 hours before the actual pitch - feverishly scribbling and sketching away with my newly bought felt tip colour markers, I came to a conclusion. In a sense, it was so hyped up so much by others that I wanted it really badly. But I realized that the more I wanted it, the more I obsessed over it. The more I obsessed over it, the more I realized that it was unhealthy.
I was reading from somewhere that it's not the fear of failure but rather failing in front of everyone after doing one's best that scared the crap out of me the most. I want to do my best. But in doing so, I'd expose myself to all sorts of criticisms and whatnot. I guess one just has to grow a thick skin and learn to deal with it. Do your best and then leave it. Otherwise I'd only have regrets of 'If only' and 'what if I'd done that instead...' blablabla. I guess some of you would be able to identify with that.
Once that was in place, I felt much more peaceful. It doesn't matter if I don't get it. Whatever position I get assigned to, I'll just do my best on it and learn as much as I can about it, as on a real flm set. It's the learning and application of it that counts.
Next up, FOOD! Talking to Singaporeans here has led me to one simple conclusion. We're obsessed about food. We talk about food. We use food in our peripheral speech and as the main context. Heck, all our subtext is filled with nothing but food talk. Typical, you might think. Maybe if you're still in Singapore, but after living in Europe for the last 10 years, it's amazing how we still think in the like manner. Guess it's part of the Singapore gene now. I wouldn't be surprised if a singapore ghost came up one day and asked where to get the best roti prata this side of town. Not that I'd want to meet one. The army had enough experiences there for me.
I should work a little more on my blog to be honest. But then again, *should* is such a subjective word, don't you think?
Usually it consists of pain, blurred vision, headaches and lots of fry-ups. But that's for hangover sufferers. I've never had one so I probably don't know of the dulled experience of it. But watching friends go through this phase of life, it pretty much convinces me that I don't want to go through it as well.
I was referring more towards the day after pitching the ideas for the 35mm commerical in school. In the middle of my preparation - about 2 hours before the actual pitch - feverishly scribbling and sketching away with my newly bought felt tip colour markers, I came to a conclusion. In a sense, it was so hyped up so much by others that I wanted it really badly. But I realized that the more I wanted it, the more I obsessed over it. The more I obsessed over it, the more I realized that it was unhealthy.
I was reading from somewhere that it's not the fear of failure but rather failing in front of everyone after doing one's best that scared the crap out of me the most. I want to do my best. But in doing so, I'd expose myself to all sorts of criticisms and whatnot. I guess one just has to grow a thick skin and learn to deal with it. Do your best and then leave it. Otherwise I'd only have regrets of 'If only' and 'what if I'd done that instead...' blablabla. I guess some of you would be able to identify with that.
Once that was in place, I felt much more peaceful. It doesn't matter if I don't get it. Whatever position I get assigned to, I'll just do my best on it and learn as much as I can about it, as on a real flm set. It's the learning and application of it that counts.
Next up, FOOD! Talking to Singaporeans here has led me to one simple conclusion. We're obsessed about food. We talk about food. We use food in our peripheral speech and as the main context. Heck, all our subtext is filled with nothing but food talk. Typical, you might think. Maybe if you're still in Singapore, but after living in Europe for the last 10 years, it's amazing how we still think in the like manner. Guess it's part of the Singapore gene now. I wouldn't be surprised if a singapore ghost came up one day and asked where to get the best roti prata this side of town. Not that I'd want to meet one. The army had enough experiences there for me.
I should work a little more on my blog to be honest. But then again, *should* is such a subjective word, don't you think?
Labels: flm school, food, pitches
posted by Dippers at 3:27 PM
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