Today

Today...........

3 flies died.

I cycled almost 2 laps round the fields. Would have been a complete 2 laps but decided that lightning and me do not mix well together.

I made a bowl of half-asian vegetable fishball tofu soup.

And I decided that in order to find my own voice I had to let go of the fear of people. What do people think of me? Screw it. If I'm too busy caught up in fear, I'll never get anything done being trapped in people's expectations. One's expectations should only come from oneself - ie. myself and no one else.

If you dream, then it's just thin air.

The journy of making the dream a reality is a never-ending process of practice, trial and error, disappointment, heartbreak, and whatever painful thing you can put here. Sure there'll be joyful times along the way but be certain it won't be easy.

After all, if it would be easy it wouldn't be a dream now would it?

And that's pretty much it.

Timely Words

Psalm 27 is a good psalm. I guess one can say all psalms are good. However for encouragement, psalm 27 is good. I might be repeating myself, but sometimes it is hard to wait and while waiting, expect something to happen. If you're doing nothing and expecting something to happen, then that's just plain laziness. If you're doing all you can and just are focused without listening, then I guess that's trying to be self-made.

The hard part, the toughest part, I'm learning the hard way - and trying not to overdramatize it as I sometimes do - is doing all I can, and then learning when to stop and listen. I get caught up doing all I can and then I don't listen to the small voice inside. I get so focused on getting the thing right, to do all I can. Sometimes listening and reflecting will save me the hours of workaround time. Sometimes I should go and chill out more.

Something I learnt is - if I want to improve something or have a nagging thought to improve it, then I should just do the improvement, and get the thought out of my head. Yups, procastination sucks. I'm a master procrastinator sometimes, but trying hard to deal with it and kill it off once and for all. Sometimes it's just so easy to lie back, relax and say - oh let's just do it later. But then later always comes along with a stack of other things. Then more stuff just gets piled up for much later, probably never to be done at all.

Psalms 27:1
The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the LORD is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

Nothing like a proper word to come in at the right time to encourage.

Now off to bed and rest before another day's work.

Absence

Here's a thought I was thinking about.

When God is absent, God's absent.

Period.

Because if he wasn't absent, he'd be present. And if he was present but chose to be silent so that we'd think that he's absent, then that's quite a sick joke.

Lazy me

I'm kind of getting lazy blogging. There's so much to do, that blogging just takes a back seat to it all. Since starting my latest project - the film company, I've just spent some time thinking and doing - trying to find ways and means to sell, reach out to my target market(s), and assorted other activities that come along with running one's own business. Read - accounting.

I hate accounting. I was never fond of numbers - and still am not fond of numbers. Of course rattling off numbers from the top of my head isn't hard, since we were drilled the multiplication and division tables as kids when we were in school. Robots we were taught to be, and maybe robots, we've become. It's sad when the world forces us to change, rather than the other way round. As far as I'm concerned, when I have kids, they are probably in all certainty not going to study in Singapore. The education system is too rigid, and frankly, there's much better quality of life in terms of childhood over here in Europe.

Here, kids can play, and be themselves and find out what it is they are good at and what not. Instead of being pigeonholed into certain "key" professions. Sure, as society progresses, it goes up the pyramid of important professions. I'm not kicking standard stuff like being a doctor, engineer, business person, etc. We need people like that, otherwise how will society function? But I would really like to see more acceptance of people who've chosen to go into a more "alternative" career choice, like myself. We were all made differently, with different sets of skills, and only when we come together are we all able to appreciate the fullness and richness that comes from diversity.

Why am I talking about this? Frankly, I really don't know. Call it a simple literary flow. I write, nay, type - writing has now been superseded by typing since the advent of the computer. And I just try to let what's inside out.

A paragraph a day, might keep the doctor away. :D